L’anima sarda

A little over two weeks ago,I stepped out onto the train platform at Elmas airport, breathed in the salty sea air and sent a thank you out into the universe for bringing me back onto this sacred land. This tiny island in the middle of the Mediterranean is responsible for giving me my “Italian” identity. For allowing me to experiment and try new things all the while being surrounded by hundreds of miles of coast, millenia of tradition and culture and the brilliant smiles of those who are lucky enough to call this place home. I often say, “Sono Sardo nel cuore”, which loosely translates to “I am Sardinian in my heart.” and this little mantra gives me joy and connects me to this place that has welcomed me with open arms and an eja!

Four years ago, I crossed paths with Kristina Jacobsen, our fearless leader, in Rome at our Fulbright orientation. Little did I know at that moment that our paths would cross in so many incredible and unexpected ways. Kristina was always reaching out to me during our year in Cagliari inviting me to join her for Cantu Cuncurdu lessons or visiting the tiny village she was living in for Carnival. This little village would carve its way into my heart and nestle into it permanently. 2 years ago, I would return to this village for Kristina’s first in-person SoS retreat. The lasting impact of an experience like this is difficult to put into words. You leave the retreat a different person. With new song babies, new ideas about yourself and new relationships you’ve cultivated along the way. The beauty in this retreat lies in the community that is built and strengthened over this short amount of time. It becomes a micro-family that you come to depend on during the week of intense work. I left that first retreat with an uncertainty about what was to come. However, the one thing I was certain about was that I would return to this place: Santu Lussurgiu. 

This year, I was invited back to the retreat as the voice teacher and community music coordinator. It was an honor being entrusted by Kristina and the team to serve in this role. As I drove into the village the night before the retreat started, I couldn’t stop smiling. It was as if I had never left. I recognized all of the twists and turns of the village and went straight up to the Christ statue that looks over the village to breathe it all in. Santu Lussurgiu is situated inside a dormant volcano and bird sounds fill the air all hours of the day. The wind breezes through every corner and crevice while offering respite to those brave enough to venture outside during the heat of summer. The distance sound of bells and an occasional horse clopping up and down those uneven cobblestoned hills. The soundscape of the village was reassuringly comforting even though the anticipation of the retreat hardly let me sleep that night. With a few last minute emergency cancellations, Kristina was quick to remind the team that what was meant to be, was meant to be and that the group we were meeting later on that day would be exactly perfect in every way. 

At the opening night song circle, our group consisted of 9 beautiful singer songwriters, 5 Sardinians: Eliana, Mavi, Marina, Gianfranco and Anjulu and 4 Americans: Kristina, Aubrie and Ayano and myself. As I sat listening to these brilliant musicians, I was in awe of their willingness to lay it all out on the line. This was just the start of another experience that will stay with me for years to come. Time stops when your in the village and suddenly it’s all over. From witnessing traditional Sardinian polyphonic singing to participating in our very own singing workshop, these people sang honestly, authentically and beautifully, and for this I could not be more proud. One of the highlights of the retreat was getting to spend one on one time with each of them in our voice lessons and watching them come to their own realizations about how special their voices truly were.

To Mavi, I sat next to you at dinner the first night and was in awe of your experiences abroad. We connected about Madrid and our love for Spain. You also had a smile that would light up the room. Always making sure that those who didn’t understand were roped into conversations and included. In our lesson, you unlocked your full sound and sang Gershwin’s Summertime with conviction and strength. You taught me that Sardegna was always home, as you were born there, left for work, but eventually made your way back. Sardegna was calling you back just as it did to me these past few years. Thank you for reminding me that the beauty of Sardinia lies in its people, food and language. 

To Marina, from the second you opened your mouth, we all knew what a bombshell you were. Tiny in stature, with a voice that gave us all “pelle d’oca.” You brilliantly played and sang each night and made us all look forward to hearing when you were going to share something. You also constantly kept us laughing at meals with your stories and were a true pleasure to be around. In our lesson, you were brilliant at navigating all facets of your voice and you assured me that singing was not for the weak of heart. Thank you for always showing up and showing OUT. 

To Eliana, you had shared that you had come to this retreat out of curiosity and because you had heard a song that Gianfranco and I had written for the first SoS. I genuinely wanted to burst out in tears when hearing this. Knowing that something that I had created with a dear friend had such an impact was so special. You were also such a wealthful resource to us during this retreat. Your translating work was a foundation and support for many of us to count on. Getting to write with you will be one of my favorite memories, not because of the final product but because of the genuine connection and laughs we shared. You also said that at the beginning of the retreat, you weren’t a musician of any kind, but you sure left as one! Thank you for trusting us and giving us all of your attention and effort throughout this process. 

To Gianfranco, you were a special friend from the first SoS retreat. A familiar face that I was STOKED to see. We sang our Ninna Nanna a few more times this week and you even let me know that you had it entered for a copyright in Italy, which made me feel even cooler because now my name is on an “official” piece of music in Italian domain. I am in awe of your musicianship and it was a joy getting to revisit our piece. One day, I asked Gianfranco if we could sing through Creep by Radiohead and he happily replied with a “When and where?” text. Gianfranco is the type of musician that could literally play anything so I knew I was in for an incredible time. We met at our rehearsal space one afternoon around 4pm and I remember singing through the piece 4-5 times and could see a woman sticking out of her balcony window with her phone filming us as we jammed out. As our songwriter-in-residence, you graciously led our group on a wonderful adventure with the #fenotoli prompt. Seriously, your mind is brilliant. I thank you for always inspiring me to create. 

To Anjulu, my friend, you are so full of youth and energy. Another familiar face from prior retreats, Anjulu was the first person I ever wrote with during Kristina’s online retreat during the summer of 2020. In 2022, our friendship blossomed and I fell in love with how you put your whole soul into everything you did. This year, I was reminded of your gentleness and kindness. You talked to everyone and made sure that we all were heard when we needed to be heard. I learned so much just from listening to you. It was really special to hear how this year’s retreat was a haven for you and I think it reminded us how healing music could be. Thank you for being your authentic self and for constantly making us laugh. See you at the next retreat! 

To Ayano, our fearless yoga leader and wonderful songstress. Music flowed from you during the voice lessons and during the song circles. You were always up for the activities and I loved always looking over and just seeing the biggest grin on your face. I am so thankful for getting to yoga and feeling rejuvenated and ready for each day. Your calm and cool nature was also genuinely needed. Thank you for reminding me that my body can and needs to take time for itself and thank you for sharing your music. I still have your melodies stuck in my head a week after the retreat!

To Aubrie, our logistics goddess! When we first met, I was so happy to have someone to have as a point of contact, especially someone from New Mexico! It was clear what an asset you were to this team from the very first day. You quickly became someone who I could simply look at across from the table and just know what the vibe was. You are humorous and just a joy to be around! It was truly a blessing to have someone who I could also geek out over music with. I am so thankful that this retreat brought us together and I know that this is just the beginning of a lifetime of friendship and collaboration. Alla prossima, Aubrie! Thank you for seriously checking in on me every five minutes to make sure I wasn’t dying <3

And lastly to Kristina, the genius behind this event. L’anima sarda. The Sardinian Soul. You are the core of this big, beautiful and complex puzzle that is Songs of Sardigna 2024. You are truly so much more than just a friend and a mentor, you are the epitome of what Sardinia is. You fearlessly speak AND translate in ALL the languages: Italian, Sardo, Navajo, English, Spanish, the list could go on for days… You constantly checked in with each of us. You listened to each of us and listened with your whole heart. You are the embodiment of what this experience can be for people. A week of love, friendship, crying, laughing, family. One of the tearjerker moments of the retreat came when one of the Italian participants said that they’ve lived in Sardinia their whole lives, yet hadn’t experienced things like our activities with Gigi and the Cuncurdu group until they had met you. You are bringing people from all walks of earth and weaving this beautiful fabric that plays massive parts in our lives whether we know it in the moment or years later. Each of these experiences for me has been life changing and profound and overwhelming and soul filling. Thank you for allowing me to be a small part of this world and thank you for sharing this place and these people with me. 

To the resilient and powerful 9 songwriters I shared my days with, I dedicate and write this with nothing but gratitude and love for each of you, for Santu Lussurgiu, for all those that took time to come to our final concert, for all the familiar faces (Ciao Franziska, Gigi, Anna Carla, Franca and so many others), to exquisite meals at Sas Benas and all in between, I sign off with a hug and a reminder to all that next year’s retreat is NOT to be missed!

Photo credit to:

Eliana Sias

Pasqua Rotatori

Bo Shimmin

#singmebackhomesongwriting #fenotoli #songsofsardegna #singmebackhomeretreats #sardinia #culturalexchange #santulussurgiu #santulussurzu